My family and I had a wonderful trip to Hilton Head Island, SC this summer. We purchased a townhome/villa/condo (whatever your flavor of terminology is 🙂 on April 1st and we went out in June. I stayed there for 10 days and Sheri and the boys stayed for 3 weeks. (Sheri’s parents came out for a week in there too).
We worked a lot but had a fantastic time!
Being home alone for a couple weeks, I just couldn’t shake this HUGE feeling of nostalgia and sadness for times past.
Also, the realization that Payton is now going to be a Junior in high school, Isaac is beginning freshman year.
Time is FLYING BY!!
Yesterday, we celebrated Independence Day. Isaac spent the night at a friend’s house the night before, so we met the family in Golden (they are great friends of ours as well) and the boys waded into the cold waters of Clear Creek.
After that, we went to another family friend’s barbeque for a bit before heading to the Broomfield Commons and the high schoolers played volleyball while we sat with my brother and sister-in-law.
It was a great day.
The nostalgia ran deep though, beginning early in the morning. Facebook had a “remember when on this date” feature that showed us celebrating July 4th through the years.
Those were just a few.
Needless to say, a few tears were shed (mostly by me).
These past few weeks I have been struck (an apt word actually) right in the feels about how fast time has gone, and continues to move.
I love my life.
I love my family.
I love all the amazing times we have shared throughout these years and yet I cannot help but feel sad that those times are in the past. I know there will always be better and more amazing times ahead, but this week I am REALLY missing times gone by.
I also found myself wondering if that during all these years, have I been the father and husband that these amazing human beings deserve. I found myself doubting. I found myself yearning to hug them a bit tighter.
I want to go back in time and re-experience holding them on my chest when they were babies as we both fall asleep in my recliner. I long to lay with them camping while staring at the stars and listen to their amazement at the vast universe spread out before our eyes. I want to go back to coaching them in youth rec soccer and watch them running around in a herd chasing after that soccer ball. I want to go back to reading to them at night, and make sure I am choosing books and directing conversation that will help me mold them into the truly amazing humans they are and will become.
I also realize all of these yearnings come from MY WANTING more than theirs.
They are wonderful young men and I know the world is a better place due to their presence. I know that as a father, I’ve done pretty well, even if I will always believe I could’ve done better.
After I left Hilton Head, I received an email from Jon Gordon that touched on these feelings. Check out this snippet below:
So, I still am having a serious case of all the nostalgia feels. But these words helped me realize that I have and continually will share these gifts with them from now until the end of time.
I miss the old times. To be honest, I miss everyday I have had with them up until today. And I know one day I will miss today as well.
Those feelings are built into the tremendous love I have for them.
I know that I will continue to have days like this.
I also know that I am looking forward to seeing them after work today. Even if it is after they are done hanging out with their friends.
I love my family fiercely and I know that they love me fiercely back.
Have a wonderful Monday and make sure to spend some time with the ones you love, if only to savor the pain of missing that time when the passage of time doesn’t allow them to be right beside you down the road.
This is a great message from Simon Sinek. (If you haven’t signed up for his daily motivation service, check it out here.
I believe having a strong work ethic and having passion for what you “do” are both vitally important.
I also believe one can lead to the other.
Even if you are not passionate about your daily job right now, if you dive in to making sure you have a strong work ethic, if you are passionate about that alone, you more than likely will find enjoyment and things you CAN be passionate about daily.
It is also possible to be passionate about something (art, music, etc) but unless coupled with a strong work ethic in those endeavors, you will not achieve nor will you grow in those avenues.
You can CHOOSE your work ethic, so put some energy into that today.
Too often, I believe, we humans strive for “perfection.”
That trip is a fool’s errand. There is no “perfect” at the end of the journey. Perfection is in the eye of the beholder for one, and for two: true perfection doesn’t exist.
And you wouldn’t want that anyway.
If you could achieve the perfect (INSERT SOMETHING HERE), where would you go from there? The only way forward is to reverse.
And if you achieved perfection and just wanted to stay there, that would be incredibly boring, cold and NOT meaningful.
Instead, strive for excellence.
The journey toward excellence seems to be filled with a lot more joy, and that needle will constantly be able to be moved more to the right.
When you strive toward excellence, you will achieve much more satisfaction, the journey will never end, and you won’t give up in the pursuit.
“Because, once we have overcome the defeats-and we always do-we are filled by a greater sense of euphoria and confidence. In the silence of our hearts, we know that we are proving ourselves worthy of the miracle of life.”-Paulo Coelho, Rio de janeiro, Novemebr 2002 (from the forward in The Alchemist)
I love this book!
I have read it a few times already and am re-reading again.
Such a simple, but moving story about following your soul’s purpose, especially when you aren’t even sure exactly what that purpose is. As long as you are doing things in life that light you up a bit, that make you feel antsy inside but also warmth, you are on the right track.
The key is to do something, anything that lights you up a bit inside. Follow the “omens” as Paulo describes them, and you will find happiness, in fact you will CREATE happiness, in your life.
I highly recommend this brief read (multiple times).
Thank you to my amazing Office Manager, Jessica for sharing this one with us in our morning meeting.
Too often we (myself included) focus on our “success.”
We want to achieve, to hit big goals, to overcome setbacks.
That is all perfectly fine, but what matters most is what we leave behind.
“Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.” ― Shannon Alder
When we leave this Earth (and believe me, none of us are getting out of here alive :), we will not be remembered for our accolades but instead for the impact we leave on others.
A bonus to all of this, is that when you seek to help others feel good, to be kind, to be caring, to be friendly, to lend a helping hand, you in turn feel better as well (exponentially in fact).
So strive to reach your goals, most definitely.
But along the way, focus more on the people who’s lives you get to touch, that impact may be much more profound than you think!
It’s a great thing to learn, to push, too improve.
It’s also a great thing to sit back, realize the world we live in is pretty amazing, these bodies we inhabit are awesome, and LIFE. IS. GOOD. 🙂
Take some time today to simply notice the above fact.
Have an awesome Tuesday!
-Dr. Lindeman
P.S. Below is an excerpt from my book “Purposely Positive” on relaxing a bit and enjoying life!
“If you go out into the world destined to improve it for everyone, that is a truly noble and amazing purpose. But what happens when you just want to enjoy Saturday for Saturday’s sake? Your purpose needs to be so strong that you are O.K. with letting up some slack every now and then. Sunsets are amazing. Can you add to them? Sure, you may be able to enjoy the moment more fully by sharing it with someone you love. The beauty may inspire thoughts that uplift you even more, but you cannot make God’s gift of a sunset more beautiful than it already is. You don’t have that power, and quite honestly, you probably wouldn’t want it. Breathe it in and savor. Sometimes the simple act of a breath is magic in itself. You have to let go sometimes, and just let things BE. (On a side note, I highly recommend a few apps for this. Check out the Breathe App through the iTunes store. It gives you daily reminders and practice to just focus on breathing for one minute at a time. Also, Insight Timer is a great meditation app for beginners and gurus alike. Check them out, you won’t be disappointed).
As you continue on your journey of self-discovery, reaching toward your inspiration and allowing it to turn the tide from negative to positive, realize that sometimes you just need to sit back, breathe, and notice. Pausing in your busy life for moments at a time can help calm your monkeys, improve focus, and allow (ironically) for more time to get things done. Relaxing a bit (on purpose) will lower your stress levels, improve circulation, and benefit your overall physical and mental health. Sounds like a pretty good cost-to-benefit ratio to me. Taking some time to relax and to be calm is a vital cog in your transformation.”
Dissemination of Inspiration 