You life is what you carry

Taken from “Maybe You Should Talk To Someone” by Lori Gottlieb

The other day, I was driving with my son. It had been one of those days where I was lost in thought, thinking of what I needed to get done before Christmas.

He interrupted my thoughts to point out a house that was wonderfully decorated and lit up with Christmas lights.

It was an amazing sight. (Well, maybe not as amazing as our very own Christmas Llama on our front lawn, but still…)

The point is, our world at any given moment is what we choose to observe.

Our world is made up of what we bring with us.

If we are negative because of a crappy morning, the world is going to be dulled, less beautiful.

If we are in a soaring mood, we will notice the beauty all around.

The good news is we can choose what we bring with us.

We can decide to imbibe all the craziness that is social media, relish in nasty comments.

We can decide to fume over some slight that happened to us yesterday.

We can decide to listen to music that only makes us cry more.

We can decide to switch the playlist and listen to joy.

We can read beautiful poetry.

We can fuel our souls with good food, good company and positivity.

We can decide how beautiful our world will be today by bringing whatever amount of beauty we want with us on today’s journey.

Have a BEAUTIFUL Monday!

-Dr Lindeman

…Love wins…

“Because at the end of the day, love wins.” (Taken from Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb).

If you’ve had any bad days lately (pretty sure most of us have), the key to not carrying it over to the next day is to realize that one day doesn’t create a month or year or etc.

The key is to resize that after the 24 hours, that day is done.

Over-with.

Kaput.

The sun comes up again in the morning ($100 you are hearing Annie’s voice in your head now, bet your bottom dollar) and you get another chance at another day.

One way to push toward a better mañana is to end the day with love.

Stop and breathe. Be grateful that you had a day (even if it was “a day”), and find something to love about the day. Even if it is something incredibly small.

Then, take some time to tell someone you love them.

Finally, take some time to tell yourself that you are loved.

End the day with love, because the truth is LOVE AWAYS WINS.

Happy Tuesday!

-Dr Lindeman

Time and Patience

“Speed is about time, but it’s also closely related to endurance and effort. The faster the speed, the thinking goes, the less endurance or effort required. Patience, on the other hand, requires endurance and effort.”- Taken from Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, by Lori Gottlieb

Later, in the same book (about a page later), she quotes the psychoanalyst Erich Fromm: “Modern man thinks he loses something-time- when he does not do things quickly; yet he does not know what to do with the time he gains except kill it.”

Our world is filled with a lot of hurry, hurry, now, now.

We want results/things/growth/success/our haircut/our food/our dose of dopamine (social media, I’m looking at you)/our purchases/our everything as soon as we give even the thoughts our energy.

Patience is not modern human’s virtue.

The conundrum is that the time spent waiting, the time spent in patience, the time spent just BE-ing bears more fruit for the soul than the actual “getting.”

Spend some time in a cam state today. Revel in the patience, it will bring much better dividends than the pressure-filled moments do.

Happy Thursday!

-Dr Lindeman

Fireflies like the dark too

I just started reading: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb (check it out here ) and I like it so far!

This line is great and bears repeating: “It’s not as if we’re going to peer in those darker corners, flip on the light, and find a bunch of cockroaches. Fireflies love the dark too. There’s beauty in those places. But we have to look in there to see it.”

So true!

I truly wish the stigma of mental health could be washed away.

Especially now, with all the craziness of the pandemic, disconnection, solitude, political and social turmoil…we need others to help keep our lives sane.

We need to talk to somebody.

I have gone to counselors and therapists numerous times.

It’s not because I am “crazy.”

It’s because I finally realized that with my drive to improve my life, my family’s life and to improve the world, sometimes I need different people riding shotgun, helping me navigate through my past, present and future.

Sometimes we need professionals to help guide us through the muck and mire.

And I, for one, am so thankful they are there and I have access to these people.

So please, if you are feeling stressed, depressed, low…know there are truly wonderful people out there that will help you see the fireflies in the darkness.

Don’t ever suffer alone.

The world needs you and holding it al in yourself isn’t helping anyone.

And again, sometimes it’s great to talk to someone just about your big dreams and aspirations and they can help you balance them all so ambition doesn’t drive you wild.

Know this: you are loved and needed.

Happy Wednesday!

-Dr Lindeman