Let’s pretend…

I love this quote.

Substitute “sales” for any word you want really and it still rings true.

The key to happiness/success/a positive life is to help others feel important.

Seriously.

That’s the key.

A wonderful side effect is that in doing so, you feel better yourself too.

Have a wonderful, IMPORTANT day πŸ™‚

Happy Wednesday!

-Dr. Lindeman

Together we rise

β€œOne person in pursuit of excellence raises the standards of everyone around them.”

So step one: be that 1 person today.

March toward a better future by putting effort in today.

That effort should be rooted in your soul, and your passion and purpose are the much needed nourishment.

When you can connect those with your desire to improve, even just a little bit, each day, the you are unstoppable.

When you do that, you help everyone around you, including me πŸ™‚

When you do that, together we rise!

(The link above will take you to Rise, a song by a The Flobots:)

Happy Thursday my friends!

-Dr Lindeman

Your Legacy

Thank you to my amazing Office Manager, Jessica for sharing this one with us in our morning meeting.

Too often we (myself included) focus on our “success.”

We want to achieve, to hit big goals, to overcome setbacks.

That is all perfectly fine, but what matters most is what we leave behind.

“Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.”
― Shannon Alder

When we leave this Earth (and believe me, none of us are getting out of here alive :), we will not be remembered for our accolades but instead for the impact we leave on others.

A bonus to all of this, is that when you seek to help others feel good, to be kind, to be caring, to be friendly, to lend a helping hand, you in turn feel better as well (exponentially in fact).

So strive to reach your goals, most definitely.

But along the way, focus more on the people who’s lives you get to touch, that impact may be much more profound than you think!

Happy Tuesday, my friends!

-Dr. Lindeman

Your passion

Simon Sinek is spot on!

I truly hope you all have a job that you love. I truly hope you are passionate about your vocation, hobbies, lifestyle, etc.

But don’t let what you DO define WHO you are.

If you love your job, it is because it resonates with your soul.

Your satisfaction comes from the combining your purpose with your activities.

Your vocation doesn’t fuel you.

Your soul is your inspiration. Your purpose precedes your vocation.

If you are struggling at work or in some area of your life right now, get back to your source, your passion, your why.

Take some time to explore that, to stoke those fires and you will see that all else improves as well πŸ™‚

Have an amazing Thursday!

-Dr Lindeman

It’s a Beautiful Morning

CLICK… SIT BACK… LISTEN.

It’s great to get inspired.

It’s a great thing to grow.

It’s a great thing to learn, to push, too improve.

It’s also a great thing to sit back, realize the world we live in is pretty amazing, these bodies we inhabit are awesome, and LIFE. IS. GOOD. πŸ™‚

Take some time today to simply notice the above fact.

Have an awesome Tuesday!

-Dr. Lindeman

P.S. Below is an excerpt from my book “Purposely Positive” on relaxing a bit and enjoying life!

“If you go out into the world destined to improve it for everyone, that is a truly noble andΒ amazing purpose. But what happens when you just want to enjoy Saturday for Saturday’sΒ sake? Your purpose needs to be so strong that you are O.K. with letting up some slack everyΒ now and then. Sunsets are amazing. Can you add to them? Sure, you may be able to enjoyΒ the moment more fully by sharing it with someone you love. The beauty may inspireΒ thoughts that uplift you even more, but you cannot make God’s gift of a sunset moreΒ beautiful than it already is. You don’t have that power, and quite honestly, you probablyΒ wouldn’t want it. Breathe it in and savor. Sometimes the simple act of a breath is magic inΒ itself. You have to let go sometimes, and just let things BE. (On a side note, I highlyΒ recommend a few apps for this. Check out the Breathe App through the iTunes store. ItΒ gives you daily reminders and practice to just focus on breathing for one minute at a time.Β Also, Insight Timer is a great meditation app for beginners and gurus alike. Check them out,Β you won’t be disappointed).

As you continue on your journey of self-discovery, reaching toward your inspiration andΒ allowing it to turn the tide from negative to positive, realize that sometimes you just needΒ to sit back, breathe, and notice. Pausing in your busy life for moments at a time can helpΒ calm your monkeys, improve focus, and allow (ironically) for more time to get things done.Β Relaxing a bit (on purpose) will lower your stress levels, improve circulation, and benefitΒ yourΒ overall physical and mental health. Sounds like a pretty good cost-to-benefit ratio to me. Taking some time to relax and to beΒ calm is a vital cog in your transformation.”

Are you a star or a leader?

Simon Sinek is awesome.

He is an excellent speaker and author and an all around wonderful human being.

I received this in his daily email service today:

β€œA star wants to see themselves rise to the top. A leader wants to see those around them become stars.”-Simon Sinek

What a simple but powerful message.

If we want to succeed for our benefit we may become stars.

And we may burn bright, for a time, only to burn out just as fast.

But if our motivation is to help lift others up, to inspire, to create positive change within others (which will also do the same for us, it’s kind of a law), then the light we help create will burn sooooo much brighter and for soooo much longer.

Focus on LEADING, not shining.

Have a wonderful Monday!

-Dr Lindeman

“Perfectionism is just procrastination…”

I saw this post from a friend this morning:

and I loved it.

In fact, I wrote a whole chapter about this in my book (I will share it below).

So many times we (myself included) use perfectionism as an excuse to not step forward, to not attempt, to not complete.

It is rather convenient that we want things to be “perfect” so we don’t finish, or even start.

We need to stop lying to ourselves (and indeed the world)…

Start, step, finish whatever you are holding off on (until its perfect), because I hate to break it to you, but “PERFECT” is impossible.

Have an awesome Thursday!

-Dr. Lindeman

P.S. Here is the chapter from my book:

Perfekshun

β€œI am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence I can reach for; perfection is God’s business.”-Michael J Fox

The desire for the perfect opportunity has most assuredly destroyed more amazing discoveries than any plague in history. Just think about all the amazing ideas that people have, the songs or art they want to create, but they wait until the ideal opportunity to begin or to release their creativity. That β€œperfect” opportunity may never come along and so all these amazing ideas and creations never even make it off the starting blocks.

Ever heard the story of the invention of the Post-it note? In 1968 Spencer Silver, and employee at the 3M company, was trying to create a super strong adhesives to aid in building planes. Instead, he accidentally created a very weak adhesive. Rather than give up on the β€œfailed” product, Silver kept sharing it with other employees. It wasn’t until 1973 when the product found a use. Art Fry, a chemical engineer and member of a church choir in St. Paul, Minnesota approached Silver about his adhesive. He needed something to keep his song page markers stick in his hymn book. They realized they could put the glue on a piece of paper and stick it to anything-and the Post-It Note was created. Even more amazing, the company didn’t think it would be very popular so they shelved it until 1977. The product was a flop at first, but they reintroduced it with more gusto and has since become one of the top five best selling office supply products ever made. All because Mr. Silver’s imperfect accident (11).

In my life, I have struggled with perfectionism. It took me quite a while (years in fact) to sit down and write this book. Thoughts in my head swirled around about having to be the perfect time, or I had to wait until I have some monumentally impactful success that the world as a whole knew about. I needed the perfect theme, the perfect audience, the perfect voice. I held myself back under the guise of perfection. The funny thing was, I have been writing my entire life. I had a 400 some odd (typed) page journal (it wasn’t a diary thank you very much) in high school. I took creative writing classes whenever I could. My first major in college was Journalism (until I found I couldn’t be as creative in my writing in those classes as I truly wanted to be). I’ve always had some sort of notebook to jot things down in. I just didn’t share my writing with too many people, unless the β€œperfect” phrase or sentence popped into my head. I was afraid. Perfectionism was my mask. 

Obviously, I’ve gotten over that somewhat, or you wouldn’t be reading this now. The more I learned about self-improvement and success, the more I realized that no one could ever be perfect. This book isn’t perfect by any stretch. But, I realized that if I truly want to share myself with the world, if I want to try to help others, one of the best ways is to be vulnerable and not hide my imperfections. I realized that the mask of perfectionism I was hiding behind was actually just smothering. The lofty mantle of perfectionism that I held onto needed to crumble.  

Perfectionism has been looked at as a positive trait over the past few generations.  I’m sure in some ways, you admire the people that you give the label β€œPerfectionist” to, they seem like lofty individuals. They are motivated, passionate, courageous and meticulous. Perfectionists are meticulous, they are successful and they are idols, or so you think. The problem is β€œperfectionism” is not the same as  β€œstrong work-ethic.” There is a HUGE difference between the two.

A strong work ethic is truly admirable. It is marvelous to strive for excellence or mastery and that cannot be accomplished without a strong work ethic. A strong work ethic enables people to get things done, to improve their craft and to help others in the process. Perfection on the other hand screams of selfishness. Perfection is never good enough. Nothing in the world is truly perfect. And honestly, the entire world is based upon our perception of it. Something that you deem as β€œperfect” is probably garbage to someone else. (If you need proof, remember someone thought Gangnam Style was the perfect song when it was released). 

Perfectionism is an absolute lie. Many times you may wait until you think things are β€œperfect” before you take a chance. You hide behind the veil of perfection and ostensibly sit in a corner and suck your thumbs because you are too afraid to take that first step. You may chastise yourself for not being perfect, which then allows you to stay down, to bury your light and hide your gifts and ultimately stay exactly where you are. Perfectionism is actually rooted in shame and fear. You hold onto an idea or creation until it is β€œperfect”- when in actuality the motive for doing so is you are afraid others might see its flaws, and therefore will see your flaws. After-all it’s so much easier to hide behind trying to be perfect than to actually just TRY. To truly β€œstrive for perfection” just opens the door to lying down, taking a long nap and just giving up all together. If you truly know, as I am sure you do, that perfect is impossible, how hard is it to nix β€œgiving it our all” if you know it won’t be perfect? Many times you opt to never start in the first place? 

I completely believe that having HUGE goals is necessary in order to allow our inspiration to flourish, to succeed and to make an impact on the world. Strive for excellence and keep stretching how excellent you can be. However, attempting perfection is nothing but an artificial pursuit. In all your endeavors do the best you possibly can, and you will notice that β€œbest” grows and grows and grows. Excellence, success, positivity, all of these things can expand and improve. The true meaning of perfection calls to mind a cold, immovable, solid…end. And truly, if you are following your passions, you don’t want them to end. You don’t want a truly finished product. You want creativity and happiness and purpose to allow continual refinement. One of the most amazing things about being human is the ability to re-imagine, amend, build on and enhance things constantly. You will never be β€œout of stock” in your ability to build amazing things, share new thoughts or create beautiful art. 

But what if someone actually created THE PERFECT cup of coffee, or THE PERFECT book, THE PERFECT anything? You can’t improve upon perfect. If you ever connected to yourself so wholeheartedly that next Tuesday, you found your purpose, and you found a way to deliver it perfectly… what would you do the following Tuesday? (I say β€˜the following Tuesday’ because I’m assuming you have some amazing parties for the next 6 days following your discovery). The next logical step would be to give up. Once perfection is truly attained, would it not simply become boring? And that is not what you are here to do. So in reality, when you say you are perfectionists, you really are giving up at the beginning, or you are destined to give up once the project is finished. Neither sound very admirable in that light. 

β€œStriving for perfection” is an exercise in futility. Your purpose is not futile. Don’t hold yourself back by trying to be perfect. Don’t be so delusional to think that whatever you create will be perfect. Hopefully you are in-tune with your passion, and you combine that with inspiration and truly produce excellence, in fact I have no doubt that is what you will do, but the beauty of excellence is you can continue to excel. So go for growth, go for beauty, go for inspiration and as Michael J Fox said, keep perfection in the hands of God.

Your response matters

Being present matters.

The things that “happen to you” matter.

The primary determining factor of your future, however, is how YOU RESPOND to what happens.

Your response (choice) in any situation (and there are ALWAYS multiple choices) will determine the brightness of your future for you, your loved ones and the world at large.

Respond well πŸ™‚

Happy Tuesday!

-Dr. Lindeman

Fireflies like the dark too

I just started reading: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb (check it out here ) and I like it so far!

This line is great and bears repeating: β€œIt’s not as if we’re going to peer in those darker corners, flip on the light, and find a bunch of cockroaches. Fireflies love the dark too. There’s beauty in those places. But we have to look in there to see it.”

So true!

I truly wish the stigma of mental health could be washed away.

Especially now, with all the craziness of the pandemic, disconnection, solitude, political and social turmoil…we need others to help keep our lives sane.

We need to talk to somebody.

I have gone to counselors and therapists numerous times.

It’s not because I am β€œcrazy.”

It’s because I finally realized that with my drive to improve my life, my family’s life and to improve the world, sometimes I need different people riding shotgun, helping me navigate through my past, present and future.

Sometimes we need professionals to help guide us through the muck and mire.

And I, for one, am so thankful they are there and I have access to these people.

So please, if you are feeling stressed, depressed, low…know there are truly wonderful people out there that will help you see the fireflies in the darkness.

Don’t ever suffer alone.

The world needs you and holding it al in yourself isn’t helping anyone.

And again, sometimes it’s great to talk to someone just about your big dreams and aspirations and they can help you balance them all so ambition doesn’t drive you wild.

Know this: you are loved and needed.

Happy Wednesday!

-Dr Lindeman